Let the monthlong celebration begin! :D
Hmm … I vaguely recall that was how I started my Birthday
Wishlist post last year too; too bad, I’m repetitive like that. Call it one of
the many disabilities I’ve been left with post this stupid brain injury and feel free to stop reading and spend your time on sth else more interesting instead.
Actually, not until you’ve got me a birthday present first! XD Here’s what I’m
after this year:
(1)
Books – books will always be the first thing
I’ll ask for. I’ve always been an avid reader; despite the blasted brain injury
leaving me such a shamefully slow reader I’ve always loved reading books ever
since I learnt to read and I’ll be damned before I let the cruel and unfaithful
God take away my love of reading too because hasn’t He, in His infinite
cruelty, taken away enough already?? >< My favourite genres are fantasy,
science fiction and historical fiction but I’m willing to give anything bar
Mills and Boon a try. XD
(2)
Minions – everyone who knows me even slightly
should know that I can’t get enough of these little fellas! I mean, they’re
yellow, jellybean-shaped and
oh-so-stupid that they’re simply incapable of being evil no matter how hard
they try; what’s not to love about them?? More minions please – banana!! :D
(3)
Singapore trip – this can be the expensive thing
I’m asking for. In wish lists past I’ve
tried asking for an outdoors electric
wheelchair since I’ve not been back to
Hong Kong for more than one DECADE and that’s practically what I want to do
more than *anything*: go back and visit all my beloved family and awesome
friends but have had to forego asking
for one since I actually had one OFFERED
to me for FREE only for mother to turn
it down since she said she wasn’t physically strong enough to bend down and
help me with things! >< Grr I can’t explain how frustrated that makes me
when I try so fricking hard every day to do the things that you take for
granted but you won’t even help me out a little each day just so that I can see
all my beloved family and awesome friends in HK! >< But the reasons why I
wanna visit Singapore: (1) I’ve only been there once, back in 2005, just over
two DECADES ago when I first graduated high school and (2) last month Singapore
just opened a MINIONS WORLD and it’s wheelchair-accessible! This obviously
relates to my second wishlist item asking for more minions; visiting Singapore again and holidaying @ MINIONS
WORLD would be outta this world!!! Also, you can get iced MILO and iced LEMON
TEA from Singapore @ Macca’s; surely that’s another reason for a Singapore
trip!!
(4)
Kit Kat cereal – here’s the food item in my
wishlist; I believe all wish lists should contain @ least one food item! Mother
usually has me eating healthy cereal like Weet-Bix and All-Bran and I used
to ask for a box
of Frosties/a pack of fun cereal (think
that’s what they call the little singe serve of boxes of Coco Pops, Fruit
Loops, etc.) but while I was grocery
shopping with a carer earlier this year I saw that Kit Kat now comes in CEREAL format and I want
to try one because obviously, chocolate
cereal can’t be wrong!! XD
(5)
Pet – yes, I will forever be horribly guilty of
the manslaughter of poor Silver and Bronze (the two goldfish Pole’s family got
for me back for my 21st birthday in 2008); how was I to know that
goldfish are so pathetic that they require a heater in their fishtank during
Winter lest they freeze to death and perish?? But it’s been over 1.5 DECADES
since they perished and surely, I can be trusted with live pets again?? Just
make sure the fishtank comes with a heater, please! Else Luke MacCourt, will I
EVER receive my pet rock from you?! When you first told me about them, I
thought you were pulling my leg about them, that pet rocks and drop bears are
cousins but when I got home I randomly googled ‘pet rocks’ and literally
discovered webpages about them! Like, they don’t require food and water
like live pets might but you can give them like different surfaces to rest on!
Luke, I realise you’re busy being a dad and all; your own dad has told me how
you’ve made a start on my pet rock and painted it yellow (in homage to the
Minions <3) so hurry up and bring me my new pet!! XD
(6)
Teddy – all my teddies are loved and all are
named (even though one’s called John Doe and the other John Doe2 XD) but I’m
always after more teddies! Bears are the original teddy but I’ve got exotic
ones like a soft toy PEARL MILK TEA and last Christmas a friend gifted me a
little DRAGON teddy so I’m always after more to add to my teddy family! My poor
writers group gets sick of me writing stories about them. XD
(7)
Cake – trouble over getting birthday cake has been
a long struggle. My current life motto’s eat more cake: fat people are harder
to kidnap. XD Back when I turned thirty, I’d asked mother could I please buy a
birthday cake only for her to IMMEDIATELY snap back, “No way! I didn’t get cake for my last birthday, so
why should you?!” I had to explain that the 30th birthday wasn’t
just any old birthday but a special DECADE birthday and she couldn’t jolly well
deny me cake!! >< In the end?
Mother lemme buy one little *slice* of cake. Were it not for friends who
understood the importance of special decade birthdays and the need for cake,
I’d have missed out entirely! O_o ><
When the next year approached, after making sure mother had cake for her
birthday I tried asking politely again: please can I have a birthday cake? Mother refuses because she says she’s gonna
MAKE me a birthday cake! See, after her retirement from nursing mid-last year
she has been making cakes/other baked goods. Personally, I would have preferred
a store-bought cake from The Cheesecake Shop (the last time I had a birthday
cake from there was fourteen years ago – nearly 1.5 DECADES) but since mother
says she’ll make a birthday cake for me, okay: will you please make me a
cheesecake?
On the night of my birthday, we’re tucking into small slices of my
birthday cheesecake. Me, after a mouthful. “Um, mother, thanks for this
birthday cheesecake you’ve made me. It’s interesting … but could you please
explain to me why the cheesecake is SALTY? Um, aren’t cheesecakes meant to be
SWEET??”
Mother looks horribly embarrassed for a split second before doubling over
and howling with laughter. “Oh, you caught me out! I was hoping that your inferior
tastebuds wouldn’t spot the difference, but they did! See, I started making
your birthday cake for you after I’d booted you to bed. It was already late; I was
very tired and I didn’t realise that the recipe said to use UNSALTED butter and
put SALTED butter instead! I was hoping that you wouldn’t realise, but you did!
Bahaha!!”
I was hoping after that she’d just lemme buy a cheap birthday cake from Woolies/wherever
but she still won’t; apparently all store-bought cakes come filled with
preservatives and other really bad stuff and they’re not good for you? But they
taste great! Plus, amazing cake bakers like Yu Lam and Lana Banana know how to
make cakes where even the INSIDES are beautifully decorated! Really, though, I’m
not too picky: I’d just like a yummy birthday cake, please! ^^
(8)
Blanket – Autumn arrived today, the days will begin
shortening and it’ll start getting colder. I’m a complete cold frog who
completely HATES the cold; in fact, a friend once observed, “Em, come Winter
you get rather dull and unresponsive.” Like, should you ask me, “How are you,
Em?” I’ll prolly just answer, “Cold.” XD
Would someone please get me a new Winter doona/blanket for my birthday? The
current one I’m using during the night isn’t a blanket, I’m pretty sure … it’s
more like a bedsheet? Besides, it’s fraying so I’m pretty sure it’s really old;
when I’ve used my leg to kick it open and cover my body, it’s gotten caught on
some thread before! To be honest I’ve absolutely zero idea where one goes to buy
a blanket but I’ve seen on some Facebook page where there are MINION QUILTS for
sale! How about you get me a Minion blanket and thus satisfy both the Minion
part and the blanket part of this wishlist??
Lol I’ve only asked for eight things but I already don’t know what more
to ask for! XD Suppose I value catching up with peers for meals out, etc. Unsure
why the parents are so against me going out and catching up with others over a
meal; mother especially seems to try her stinking hardest to keep me socially
isolated. I wish she wouldn’t but the only way I can think around that’s if you
contact me first? I’m best contactable over Facebook Messenger and not SMS
since I don’t usually get mobile access unless I’m out so please reach out,
drop a line and say sth like, “Hey, heard it’s your birthday soon; let’s do
lunch/dinner/whatever’ together!
Oh, and as always, I reserve the right to add to this wishlist, so should
you come up with anything I might like, please tell me! Else just get it for
me. XD
Next post here … well, if I’m organised it’ll prolly be a movie review
since I’ve seen two/three movies over the Christmas/New Year break but if I’m
not, you’ll prolly not here from me again until September, when I share about
how I spent my birthday this year! XD
Until then~
Cheers,
Em. ^^
P.S. Now go, everyone scatter and secure me birthday presents! XD
P.P.S. (9) Automatic tap and soap dispenser - when I was last back in HK (2012), I discovered that taps and soap dispensers had become automated! After getting some soap and washing herself, my right hand chucked my left hand into the sink and said you've gotta try this; it's so cool! Think mother found an automatic soap dispenser for me from Priceline and Uncle Calvin found an automatic tap from EBay for like thirty bucks? Someone please get me these two practical gifts!
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