Monday, March 18, 2024

Birthday Reflections 2024

 

Ooh I’m finally being more organised: in years past, I didn’t start writing my birthday reflections until the day before/my actual birthday itself, but this year I’m improving and I’m starting them TWO days before my birthday arrives! XD

My first year living life on the wrong side of thirty has unfortunately been like all the years previous since suffering my brain injury. It’s not easy to explain: can you understand how freaking ANNOYING it is to live in a body that doesn’t work properly?? Basically 24/7 I’m freaked out that I’ll fall over and hurt myself – I’m lucky in that the rare times I do stack it I only fall backwards and land on my bum. You know what they say, right? Fat butt, good cushioning! XD Only I’m forever aware that I may fall awkwardly next time, instinctively throw out my ‘good’ arm, land on her and hurt her ... if I were to injure my better arm and take her outta commission too I’d be royally screwed because she’s the only functioning arm I have left that I do EVERYTHING with and if she’s injured and unable to work too … *shudders at the very thought*

But not to worry! When I was first released from the insane asylum (more commonly known as the Brain Injuries Rehab Unit of the Princess Alexandra Hospital XD) back near the end of May 2008, I still had to return to the day hospital for rehab physio. The physio working there saw how stressed out and uncomfortable I was with moving around and gave me this very useful piece of advice: if you haveta freak out, freak out inside your head. Don’t cause a fuss in the real world and create a disturbance. Well, what can I say? This year will mark a blessed sixteen years since I’ve been let out from that awful place forever, and I think I’ve got the act pretty down pat by now! Pretty sure nobody can tell that the instant I’m sitting down, 99.95% of me fast forwards to when I’ll haveta get up and walk again, that I may fall awkwardly and seriously injure my right hand/arm … so, all’s good! XD

Unfortunately, I’ve still not managed to rejoin the workforce yet. Mostly I think that’s because I’m too disabled to do anything that can contribute to society and then there’s also the fact that I’ve not got any qualifications. Several years ago, I did telemarketing for one month; when that role ended, I was enrolled to start studying some cert two course in business admin. Unfortunately, I didn’t finish that course since I legitimately suffer from memory loss and would forget to submit a lesson! Some person working at Axiom College said he’d keep giving me extensions provided I submitted one course per month but when I forgot to one month, I contacted them later explaining my situation and asking can I please keep studying? I was told yes, but only if you repay the entire school fee again since the course has been updated from when you first started. How frustrating. >< But in case you can help, I’m willing to do ANYTHING, provided I can do it whilst seated and it gets me properly paid. I’ve only got one hand left to use but one-handed, type approx. 30WPM.

Am still randomly sprouting white hairs every now again, but by my ripe old age, apparently, it’s normal? Besides, Mr. Google also teaches that stress can cause white hair and considering how much stress mother puts me under every day, I’m just surprised that I’m not showing up with an entire HEADFUL of white hair! XD

Life one year older: physio’s still the bane of my existence. I think I’ll just call it a necessary evil. By now I’ve basically resigned myself to the fact that I’ll spend the rest of my days living the disabled life. >< Still continuing with activities like book club, writers group, Toastmasters and table tennis. They’re all good fun~

Next post here: prolly a movie review! Despicable Me 4’s coming out later this year and that means MORE MINIONS; <3 the Minions!

Righteo, until then~

Cheers,

Em. ^^

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